text kinda kills :P
lol
its mainly the fact that it stands out SO much
first off, its quite big.....and secondly, there is nothing near it......so it draws more attention to itself.....

what u wanna try and do is add SOMETHING.....not too much or too little.....just the right amount, but add something on the LHS......i would suggest a C4D that flows well with the BG maybe set to lighten or screen or sumthing.....

also, that red in the text is kinda meh :P


generally, ure improving ALOT.....this one has a good layout and FX.....just work on ure text.....or if u CBA......just leave it out altogether.....